


Peace and Love on the Planet Earth

by pRESENTMIC



Category: Gravity Falls, Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Homeworld Gems - Freeform, Hurt/Comfort, Stan has been through things, crystal gems au, ford is mentioned, well its that au with a twist i guess kinda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-25
Updated: 2016-07-25
Packaged: 2018-07-26 16:32:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7581616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pRESENTMIC/pseuds/pRESENTMIC
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stanley Pines was no ordinary human being. In fact, he wasn't human. He was just stuck on Earth. Well, he's been stuck on Earth for fifty eight years (and counting). All because he was defirmed, imperfect. Mistakes weren't taken lightly on Homeworld. Especially if you didn't get the brains of the family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Peace and Love on the Planet Earth

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhh let's torture Stanley!

As Stanley shifted the neck of his shirt over his right shoulder, he fiddled with the gun in his hand. He couldn't ever not be too careful. The streets were dangerous. Especially if Rico and his goons were out there. He had already gotten stuffed inside of a trunk, and had almost cracked his gem in a rush escape from some desperate gang. 

Now he was inside of his car driving to a strange place called "Beach City". It sounded typical and cheesy. Just like him. As he knowingly drove over the speed limit he examined the random giant lady statue from a distance. Seemed like some sort of strange temple. Meh, he'd seen stranger from Homeworld. 

He looked in his rearview mirror to check if he was being chased. His eyes widened when he saw what was (unexpectedly) chasing him. Four figures running behind him and an alien monster demon thing. Yeah, this was going to be a no Stanley situation. He nodded, agreeing with himself. As Stan was about to ignore the war behind him, one of the four figures landed on his windshield. 

Stan let out a yelp of surprise as a kid stood up with a determined look on his face. The boy gave Stan a friendly smile, and a wave before leaping up and disappearing from Stan's line of sight. This was where he drew the line. This kid was too young for this crap as far as he knew. Stopping the car, Stan kicked the car door open and yelled, "HEY! ALIEN SUCKER, WHY DON'T YOU FIGHT A REAL GE-MAN!" 

The monster turned to look at Stan before barging towards Stan. Fortunately, this specific conman had already brandished his good ol' knuckle dusters. He wasn't quite sure why he chose that specific weapon, but it was the most comforting. Besides his pistol, of course. That arm was a lifesaver. Quite literally. "Right hook!" Stan yelled out fearlessly shoving his fist up the monster's face 

As Stan continued to mercilessly punch the living daylights out of the beast, he didn't notice the other three anonymous people creeping up on him and brandishing their weapons. As the poof of magic left behind distorted crystals, Stan was leaped on by three additional weights. Panic filled Stan's sight at the sudden attack. 'What's happening, why am I being attacked? Gotta get out gotta get out GOTTA GET OUT.'

Stan stumbled through the weight, and saw who had attacked him. Three Gems. An Amethyst, some fusion, and a -ugh- a Pearl. Pearls brought back bad memories. They were SUFFOCATINGLY obediant and stubborn. He grimaced at the sight of the Gems. Honestly, Stan hated all of them. Gems were trouble and Gems meant pain. He wasn't going to stick around and find out what they were going to do to him. 

"Who are you? Are you a spy from the Homeworld?" The Pearl shouted.

Stan narrowed his eyes at the Pearl. She had known he was a Gem. His shirt must have slipped. Stan groaned inwardly at his mistake as he lifted his hands up in a surrender. "Take out the spy and add in "mistake"." Stan grumbled. He slipped off his knuckle dusters and cautiously eyed the remnants of his victim.

"Who are you?" The fusion said (quite intimadatingly as well).

"The name's Stanle-er, Stan. My job, you ask? I'm a grifter and an outlaw on Earth. Ah! I see your names are Square Head, Grape Juice, and Salty. Nice to meet you, and goodbye." Stan shoved his shirt back up to cover his half-gem. Stan carefully watched out of the corner of his eyes as he walked towards his El Diablo. What he didn't notice was the previous kid standing in his way. 

Stan stumbled over the boy and grasped the hood of his car to prevent any physical damage. "Hot Belgian waffles, kid! I almost crushed yo-"

"The name is Steven!" The kid (Steven) enthusiastically stuck out his hand.

Stan raised an eyebrow at the sudden acquaintance, but begrudgingly shook his hand.

"Wanna come over and eat with us? If you do eat, that is." Steven gave the conman an innocent smile.

Stan gave the kid a long look. He seemed genuine. Anyways, what was the kid going to do? Hug him to death? Eh, he doubted the kids caretakers would let him. Stan opened his mouth to answer, but was interrupted.

"Steven! You can't just go and invite an unknown Gem to our temple! What if he tries to destroy Earth!" Salty shoved past Stan and yanked Steven towards her. Huh. So she was the caretaker. She was also a low-key douche.

Stan glared, "Hey, Salty! I'll have you know that I've been living on this planet for the past fifty eight years! You really think I want to destroy this place? It's practically my home!" Stan let out an annoyed sigh and pushed past the two. "And prison." He muttered.

Salty and Steven stared at the Gem. A heavy silence added another weight of awkardness to the conversation. Steven called out once again, "If you do feel hungry, than come up to the temple! We'll have food prepared!" 

Stan halted his movements of getting into his car. He turned his head sideways and mumbled. "Thanks for the offer." He clicked his keys in and started up the engine.


End file.
